Hey God. Um...Can you hear me???

Have you ever had something that you pray for consistently, but you feel as if your prayer is never answered or that God is ignoring you? Of course! We all have. We become weary of praying and waiting, we and begin to question the purpose and power of prayer. There is a reason for some of those "unanswered prayers".


I believe that God places His will in our hands. For example, it's God's will for everyone to be "saved", but God gives us a choice as to whether or not we choose Him.. It's kinda like the movie "The Matrix" (red pill or blue pill"). You can CHOOSE the path that God has for you or you can CHOOSE not to follow His path. Overall, God is a God of choice. He allows us to choose our fate.

How does he allow us to choose our fate, and why would he do that if He has everything planned out? And since he has everything planned out, what's the point of praying and asking for things?
1). The prayers of the righteous prevaileth MUCH. 

This means that the prayers of those who are Righteous, who choose to honor and serve God with their whole hearts, have a looottt more weight than those who are unrighteous. That being said, it's like a mother having an obedient child and a bad child. The obedient child probably gets more, and appears to be the favorite child. Is it because the mothet loves him more? No. It's because the obedience of the child softens the mother's heart to WANT to give to the child. Same thing with God. Those who are Righteous and obedient have greater favor with God than disobedient servants.

2. God answers our prayers and desires based on the condition of the hearts. 

As far as God seeing our heart, it's works like this; Sometimes we want a BMW but get stuck with a Honda. We pray and pray for that BMW and STILL get stuck with that Honda. Why is that?? Well, first God analyzes WHY we want the BMW. Is it to be flashy and boastful? Is it to feel successful? Also, He examines our hearts to see if we are ready for that BMW. Will you idolize the BMW? Will you allow yourself to get in greater debt with the BMW? Will you remain humble? Will you continue to serve God and help others? These are factors that God considers before just giving us what we ask for. Kind of like a mother. You asked her for a lot growing up. Some things she said "no" to, and though we didn't understand as children, ultimately we had to understand that mothers tend to know most times what's best for their children. Same thing with God.

So, if u ever question why prayers arent getting answered, examine your heart. Does your heart dwell with the things of God? Or your own selfish desires? If your heart is lined up with the word of God and in the will of God, you shouldn't have a problem. Does that mean u get everthing you pray for? Heecckk NO. But it does mean that if you don't get what you pray for, you will TRUST God's reasoning. Once we submit our lives to God, we ask for His will to be done. Because God gives us choice, we have to ALLOW God to be God if we CHOOSE to serve, trust, and rely on Him. Having faith in God and His will means that sometimes we may not understand WHY God doesn't do this/that or answer this/that prayer. But even if we don't understand, we know that in the end, God knows best, and He loves us so much that sometimes he just can't give us everything that we ask for because we don't always know what's best for ourselves. Even if we THINK we do, ultimately, God knows best, and He will give us the best IF we CHOOSE to allow Him too.



The best place for us to start, is to throughly, openly, and consistently examine our hearts. Ask God to give you His heart. Whatever breaks His heart, I want it to break my heart. Whatever brings Him joy, I want it to bring my joy as well. When me heart's not right, I don't want to be at peace. I want to be so convicted that I cannot even function until my heart is where it needs to be. It's THAT serious!





Thank you for taking the time to allow me to share my thoughts on this matter!


~Aleshia

Feeling Some Kind of Way

That moment.. when you realize that you are annoyed with everything.. emotional for no tangible reason. Annoyed by those closest to you, and just overall unhappy with the way that certain circumstances are going in your life.. You don't want to talk about it, and you really can't put your finger on what is bothering you..You just know that you're bothered lately..rather impatient.. slightly confused and FEELING SOME KIND OF WAY. This very moment is the moment that has caused for serious action on your part: SELF EVALUATION!

But I am always evaluating myself..setting goals for myself.. finding ways to improve.. What do you mean by self evaluation?

It's like cleaning your house. Every week you do a series of chores: washing dishes, washing clothes, wiping down counter tops, cleaning restrooms, etc. But you have those days throughout the year that you CLEAN your house.. You strip everything: take all the clothes out of the closet to see what you're going to keep/give away, move all the furniture to shampoo, dust reorganize, etc.. Clean out the garage, pull the weeds in the front yard.. etc. Yeah, THAT kind of cleaning. The kind that takes a few days opposed to a few hours. That's the kind of self evaluation I'm talking about: A point of re-evaluating, re-structuring, and re-focusing.

BEFORE YOU CAN KNOW WHERE YOU ARE GOING, YOU MUST FIRST KNOW WHERE YOU ARE.

Time to make those lists! Many of us find ourselves either absolutely ANNOYED by creating list or absolutely in love! My relationship with lists are bitter-sweet, BUT I will say that when it comes to keeping track of long term goals, these lists have shown to be quite necessary. Purchase one of those composition books so that you have something to always reference at all times, jot down notes, etc. Here are a few lists to get you started:

1. The Bucket List- Time to have fun! This is the list on ANY and EVERY single thing that you want to accomplish before your departure on this earth. This ranges from traveling, to adventure, to volunteering/community service. The only thing to remember is that this list has NO limits. At any time this list can be expanded, but you must also ensure that you are checking things off of your list. Don't let this list sit. Just to name a few of the things that are on my personal bucket list: I would like to take a trip to Jerusalem and walk where Jesus walked. Explore where Jesus reigned. I would like to take my family ranging from my parents, cousins, aunts, etc on  MASS vacation for about two weeks, as often as possible, to where they worry about nothing but having the time of their life! I would like to climb the Great Wall of China. I would like to financially adopt at least 3 children in a poverty stricken country and receive weekly updates from them throughout the duration of their lives.. My list is complex..and endless.. so I will stop here!! Your turn :)

2. The Mirror List-This list can be two columns: where you are on one side, and where you'd like to go. My mirror list is divided by periods of years. For example, in two years, I'd like to see myself here..or in five years, I'd like to see myself there...BUT NOT FINANCIALLY.. only mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. Take this time to truly analyze where you are. BE REAL WITH YOURSELF. Embrace the fact that you have flaws and areas that may need work. Analyze the roots of your damage.  Consider some aspects that those close to you may hinted where improvement is needed. Really take this time to dig into the depths of inner you. This process may hurt...may be emotional.. It may even allow you to see some things that absolutely disgust you. That's okay. Let it happen, and take comfort in the fact that you feel the way you feel because you are ready for change. This list is not one of those "write in one hour" lists, as you are always evaluating yourself, and sometimes we miss so many things about ourselves because we do not SLOW DOWN. Don't rush this process. Seclude yourself. Concencrate yourself. Remove some things from your life..Silence all distractions and do whatever it is that you need to do to recognize areas where improvement is needed. Write these things down of the first column "Where I Am". Now, on the next column, "Where I'm Going", write down the areas that you would like to see yourself improve over a period of time. UNDERSTAND, change does not happen overnight, but it starts with an open and WILLING heart.

3. The Pocket List-This list serves as your financial goals, and it has THREE parts/columns. Again, you must first start by analyzing where you are, this time financially. Take a sum of all of your bills ranging from mortgage/rent, utilities, gas, car insurance, credit cards, student loans, etc. Anything and everything that you pay on a consistent basis should be considered. After you get this number, subtract this number from the income you generate every month. Now, add all of your savings, stocks/money shares, 401ks, etc. What do you have left? Is it scary?!! lol. It may very well be, but that's okay, because that's about to change hence the reason you're even creating this list. That was the first part of your list, the "where I am". Easy right? Okay, here comes part two: where would you like to see yourself financially? Many will say DEBT FREE.. or RICH!! lol. NOT GOOD ENOUGH!! This is a very detailed list. For example, if you desire to be debt free, be specific abut your debts that you would like to have paid off and WHEN you would like to have them paid off. Now the challenging part, the third column "How are you going to get there?" This is the most challenging part, because it's sooo much more to this list than just working overtime making a few extra bucks. This list also requires a deep evaluation and mot importantly SACRIFICE. First things first, are you where you need to be in order to generate a comfortable income i.e your career verses a job? If not, that should be one of the first things on this part of the list. Look for a career in your field, return to school, start your own business, get an internship etc. However you need to gradually achieve getting out of the "living check to check" curse, list that. Now the sacrifice part.. yay!!! This is the part where you list those things that you need to give up in order to pocket more money. Some examples include FAST FOOD..shopping when you KNOW you don't have it..cutting out the EXTRA bills, like cable bills that includes DVR, the extra sports/movie channels, and all of the other 600 channels that you not watch/or need. This is what I mean about how you are going to get there or in other words, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE?  

4. The Companion List-To answer your question, this list is to list that things that you would like to see in your companion if you are married/dating..BUT this list is also things that you would like to see in yourself as someone else's companion and/or areas that you would like to improve in as someone else's companion! Another one of those two column lists :) Stick by this list. UNDERSTAND, that people change, we change, things change. Also, understand that somethings are "negotiable". It's okay to be particular, but don't be TOO picky. What I mean by that , for example, is that it's okay to say that I would like to have a companion who is successful and financially stable..But to say that you would like to have a companion who is the CEO of Apple and owns at least 69 shares of stock is a bit STEEP don't you think? lol. It's okay to want someone who is serious about their physical appearance and upkeep.. but to require someone to weight exactly 130 pounds and to only wear name brand clothing purchased in Beverly Hills, CA is a bit..Insane lol. Point is.. Be particular. Be very particular. Don't be ridiculous though. Also, don't expect anything from anyone that you aren't willing to do and/or change.

This is a start! SELF-EVALUATION!!! There are probably tons of lists to add to this. If you have any to add, please share, as we are all in this together to inspire, to encourage, and to LOVE :) Thanks for reading.

~Aleshia



Why don't any of my relationships EVER work out?

Ever wonder why none of your relationships EVER workout? Seems like time after time, you continue to give your heart, to give your all, yet everything STILL falls apart. Why the heck is that?! Well, if you battle with constant failing relationships it can only mean one thing: Your heart is not in the right place.

Here is the structure of many of these consistent failing relationships.  We call ourselves " Doing me"or "Working on me" until someone that takes interest in us comes along. Even though we know we're not ready on a personal level, we engage in this relationship wishing for the best and hoping that this will be our happily ever after. We start falling hard for this person, and the relationship becomes the center of our worlds. We are extremely happy in the relationship, and can't imagine life without this person. That's all good, but what we fail to realize is sometimes the more we fall, the more our hearts shift in the wrong direction. Your life is centered around this person..getting to know everything about this person..pleasing this person..making this person happy.. spending time with this person... The relationship means the world to us, and we sacrifice and dedicate every bone in our being to ensure that it works! This is where our heart is, with this relationship,and it becomes our only focus neglecting other things that are essential to our being. Hello?? Have you forgotten that you still have internal issues to deal with before bringing someone else into the picture? Have you neglected your relationship with God? Have you totally released your happiness, success, and overall being to the status of this relationship?? #FAIL! Just a few notes; if God is not the center of the relationship, it will NEVER Work. Yeah, you all might stay together for a long time, you might even have a few kids linking you forever..You may even marry and become quite comfortable with your situation..but you will definitely sacrifice some happiness. You will find yourself settling..stuck..and you will never reach the point of COMPLETE happiness and fulfillment in that relationship. Please consider these things before jumping into another failed relationship and wasting more time and emotion!



1. If God is NOT the foundation of your relationship, it will NOT work!
Revisiting the fact that in these relationships we spend time getting to know everything about this person..pleasing this person..making this person happy.. spending time with this person... BUT we completely neglect God! What about your relationship with God? What about spending time with HIM? Getting to know HIM? We spend so much time trying to please our mates that we fall into SIN and compromise the things of GOD. We break God's heart just to make their hearts and their bodies feel GOOD. We find ourselves indulging in pre-marital sex... We find ourselves giving into our tempers and allowing matters to become out of control. We find ourselves making irrational decisions for ourselves because we are overtaken by emotions.. then we find ourselves RIGHT BACK WHERE WE STARTED, at the top of the roller coaster putting band-aids on areas that need surgery! It's simple.. Why would God bless a relationship that does not honor Him?

2. Get you together.... FIRST!
 Never engage in a relationship before you are ready. Be real with yourself! YOU know you. You know how mentally and emotional unstable you are. You know that you are not established. You're consistently trying to "find yourself" but you keep getting side tracked. Slow Down. CHILL. Love you some YOU! Find who you are and then love who you are. Embrace your solitude and spending time alone. If you feel like someone always HAS to be around or like you just HAVE to have a companion, that is a major problem. Yes, it may be what you're used to. It may be what you prefer..but that does not mean that's what's best.

3. Stop comparing your life and relationships with others.
Just because everyone else around you is in a relationship doesn't mean you have to be. Just because this generation has become so laxed with the things of the world doesn't mean you still can't stand firm on the things of God. Understand that each of us have a different walk, a different path, and a different relationship.

4. Learn how to say NO!
You don't have to engage in a relationship with every one who shows an interest. You don't have to give it up to everyone who is attractive or requires sex for you to be in a relationship with them. You don't have to stay in that mentally and emotionally unhealthy relationship because the person you're dating pleads, begs, and promises for things to get better. It's okay to say NO.


5. Surround yourself with people who will tell you what you DON'T want to hear!
These are friends. Those who will encourage what's right and what's healthy. Those will will stick by you even when they know you aren't making the right decision just for moral support. You value their opinion, and you know that they are only going to tell you the truth and not just want you want to hear. They know when to speak and how to say it. You may not like it all the time, but you should respect it. Do not distance yourself from these people as they truly have your best interest. Even though it appears to be more comfortable to surround yourself by individuals in the same situation or individuals who agree with your every move, it is definitely not in your best interest.


Don't allow yourself to continue going in circles on the same roller coaster. Demand change. Demand better. Demand results...staring with YOU.

*If you are at a point where you would really like to evaluate yourself, but you just don't know where to start, check out this blog:
 http://aleshiasworld.blogspot.com/b/post-preview?token=G2dSMDgBAAA.MnMn3_GN2-1_xsNUcv9yAg.yZP_Ftl15CsTGxFMvsuXfg&postId=9024639397898525567&type=POST


~Aleshia